I think the experience might be different if it’s outside of a psychedelic mediated context. I’ve experienced psychosis and ego disintegration where “everything was connected to everything in the universe”. But, that’s because I experienced extreme childhood trauma. The psyche can only hold so much. The second experience with ketamine, years later, felt more aligned with what might conventionally be called a ‘spiritual awakening’. I still don’t know what any of this means. Mental health professionals have not been of any help. So, I’m trying to accept it as part of my own human experience. Ego inflation is a real thing. It’s much too prevalent in psychedelic healing circles which is a total turn off. I guess they all had ‘their’ spiritual awakening.
It reminds me of the climbers that do Mt. Everest. A couple decades ago, it was just a few that made it to the summit. Now, it’s a traffic jam up to the top. It no longer represents the triumph it once symbolized. I think that’s happening within psychedelic field. Now that everyone’s ‘awakened’ — what do we do with that? I know. We all become shaman. We create a commune in Peru. We leverage and capitalize. I guess I’m getting jaded. What’s the point?
There's a zen saying: "Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water." Having these experiences--or after some practice, having regular access to these experiences--doesn't really change your responsibilities to the world, and shouldn't really change your outward behavior. It primarily changes your _internal experience_ of the world. Hopefully for the better.
My hope is that as meditation and psychedelics become more common, people start to see these experiences as a normal and natural part of being human, rather than as some kind of spiritual or moral attainment.
I greatly appreciate the phenomenology. I interviewed a medical writer whose book went deep into trying to reverse-engineer experiences in neural terms.
The 2 meditation techniques. What the buddhists call samatha and vipassana. What the raja yogis call meditation with a seed and meditation without a seed. Are referred to by some as shrink and grow.
Yeah, but being once again an infant is, in fact, levelling up, paradoxically. Jesus spoke directly about this, about the need to become as little children again, and there's also something related in the Tao Te Ching. I'm curious though, Chogyam Trungpa described enlightenment as the sky turning into a blue pancake and landing on your head. In the end, does that make sense to you? It does to me now (definitely not when I first read it).
Hah what a strange quote. It does resonate, but it’s one of those poetic metaphors that I find frustratingly vague.
Being able to move between the infantile state and a normal waking state at will would definitely be a remarkable skill, and something I might consider “leveling up”. But I really try to avoid that way of thinking, because it sends too many people on an ego trip (myself included!)
And Chogyam Trungpa, coincidentally, is a great example of how someone with access to these states can end up on a wild ego trip and hurt lots of people.
Fascinating read; I think this is why I subscribed to Superb Owl back in the day. Observations are very accurate and highly distilled - a certain rival to Ai.
The full jump can't really be described any other way. 'God' talks to you, an unmistakable sort of buzz, and death is on the cards but it's an acceptable trade-off for "meeting God". All the comfort you can experience and create with the meditative outer body states helps. If one can relax and try to continue living normally while entertaining the sheer out-of-your-untold-fucking-headness of it, it is a true blast, the experience of a lifetime, but people also go quite mad because they have exactly zero point of reference. Thank heavens psychotropic drugs existed in the 90's to give Gen.X a heads-up, haha...
I think the experience might be different if it’s outside of a psychedelic mediated context. I’ve experienced psychosis and ego disintegration where “everything was connected to everything in the universe”. But, that’s because I experienced extreme childhood trauma. The psyche can only hold so much. The second experience with ketamine, years later, felt more aligned with what might conventionally be called a ‘spiritual awakening’. I still don’t know what any of this means. Mental health professionals have not been of any help. So, I’m trying to accept it as part of my own human experience. Ego inflation is a real thing. It’s much too prevalent in psychedelic healing circles which is a total turn off. I guess they all had ‘their’ spiritual awakening.
It reminds me of the climbers that do Mt. Everest. A couple decades ago, it was just a few that made it to the summit. Now, it’s a traffic jam up to the top. It no longer represents the triumph it once symbolized. I think that’s happening within psychedelic field. Now that everyone’s ‘awakened’ — what do we do with that? I know. We all become shaman. We create a commune in Peru. We leverage and capitalize. I guess I’m getting jaded. What’s the point?
Yeah I feel this.
There's a zen saying: "Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water." Having these experiences--or after some practice, having regular access to these experiences--doesn't really change your responsibilities to the world, and shouldn't really change your outward behavior. It primarily changes your _internal experience_ of the world. Hopefully for the better.
My hope is that as meditation and psychedelics become more common, people start to see these experiences as a normal and natural part of being human, rather than as some kind of spiritual or moral attainment.
I greatly appreciate the phenomenology. I interviewed a medical writer whose book went deep into trying to reverse-engineer experiences in neural terms.
https://randallhayes.substack.com/p/q-and-a-with-philip-nicholson
He was working on another book at the time. I should probably follow up with him.
The 2 meditation techniques. What the buddhists call samatha and vipassana. What the raja yogis call meditation with a seed and meditation without a seed. Are referred to by some as shrink and grow.
Which fits quite nicely.
Yeah, but being once again an infant is, in fact, levelling up, paradoxically. Jesus spoke directly about this, about the need to become as little children again, and there's also something related in the Tao Te Ching. I'm curious though, Chogyam Trungpa described enlightenment as the sky turning into a blue pancake and landing on your head. In the end, does that make sense to you? It does to me now (definitely not when I first read it).
Hah what a strange quote. It does resonate, but it’s one of those poetic metaphors that I find frustratingly vague.
Being able to move between the infantile state and a normal waking state at will would definitely be a remarkable skill, and something I might consider “leveling up”. But I really try to avoid that way of thinking, because it sends too many people on an ego trip (myself included!)
And Chogyam Trungpa, coincidentally, is a great example of how someone with access to these states can end up on a wild ego trip and hurt lots of people.
Fascinating read; I think this is why I subscribed to Superb Owl back in the day. Observations are very accurate and highly distilled - a certain rival to Ai.
The full jump can't really be described any other way. 'God' talks to you, an unmistakable sort of buzz, and death is on the cards but it's an acceptable trade-off for "meeting God". All the comfort you can experience and create with the meditative outer body states helps. If one can relax and try to continue living normally while entertaining the sheer out-of-your-untold-fucking-headness of it, it is a true blast, the experience of a lifetime, but people also go quite mad because they have exactly zero point of reference. Thank heavens psychotropic drugs existed in the 90's to give Gen.X a heads-up, haha...
https://substack.com/profile/100124894-steven-berger/note/c-48486199